do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
All she was asking was for you to describe your coat so she could get it, but you kept yelling at her so the security threw you out.
Three questions... How drunk were you? How long until we can make fun of you for this? Do you even really need a spleen?
We're having a serious conversation and I just responded to something he said with an emoticon. I am so baked.
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
Im sorry i offered the man at mcdonalds your hand in marriage in exchange for some french fries
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
If it's any consolation, I made really strong brownies yesterday and had 3 and then I saw demons
So none of you told me my tits were popping out of my shirt for three hours?
We told you. Repeatedly. You said you made it look good.
Also there's so much vodka on my breath that if I blew on my fingers my nail polish would fall right off
Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
Randomize
