How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
woke up in my one night stand's bed and barfed all over her floor. she came back from the bathroom, looked at the vomit, looked at me and said "normally i'd tell you to clean it and get the fuck out, but i remember the sex was good, so i'll let it go." Score.
I told him we couldn't have sex because I was ovulating and "I come from fertile people."
He was rambling about life and dignity and happiness. but all i kept thinking was PENIS. YOU HAVE A PENIS. I CAN SHOW YOU WHERE TO PUT THAT PENIS.
if you want blown tonight you're gonna have to take me up on that offer now. in less then 45 minutes you're gonna be blacked out and i'm not doing something i'm not getting credit for in the morning.
This whole night would have been avoided if the liquor store had air heads
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
Last night was just one giant freudian slip.
You made out with EVERYBODY.
Can I just bleach my life?
Just got biofeeze on my vag. Weirdest sensation everrr. Can't decide if I want to cum or cry
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
When nipples stop being hilarious I'll stop getting them out in public.
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
Yeah but sometimes your vagina needs to be fed and when we are drunk we tend to eat junk food
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
yea i'll help you find a man. but, when I say jump, you say on who.
Randomize
