Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
I just did the classiest thing ever.
last time you said that you got chlamydia.
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
Dude, im sorry I had sex with that girl I was trying to hook you up with last night. Good news though she puts out
I was grossed out that all their candles smelled like vagina and then I remembered where my fingers had been.
Just realized my relationship wasn't even Facebook official and I'd already cheated on him. 'Shitty girlfriend' is an understatement.
My phone autocorrects "pooping" to "popping" and I'm like DO YOU EVEN KNOW ME??!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I decided to start over my porn collection by deleting the old stuff. That was a sad piece of a pie chart...
It's like fucking tetris in this bed
FUCK YOU VODKA I'M TRYING TO ADULT RIGHT NOW
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?
He told me to grab his penis so I did and swung it around and said “awe, it looks like the wacky inflatable tube man.
Omg I joined a choir last night...
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