SURVIVED FINALS. CAN'T DIE FROM ALCOHOL POISONING. NOTHER SHOT. CAPS.
So apparently we dropped beers outside the apartment last night, and someone RETURNED them! Ha like what? I just walked out the front door to Christmas in a box on my doorstep.
will you please stage a drunk girl intervention and tell him that his chain is severely harming his chances of getting laid tonight?
FYI...Jose likes Shamrock shakes better than Jack
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
theres chocolate ground into my couch, nerds candy all over the floor and cocaine on every surface. great memorial day weekend and yours?
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
Making a mobile stripper pole for the back of my truck memorial weekend. Is where dignity goes to die
Just jacked in the family restroom in the hospital while eating beef jerky and looking at reddit gone wild.
Wound up hungover. Visiting 4 y/o nephew suggested cookies and milk and playing Kirby with him with the sound down. This kid is going places.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When are your genitals available?
just the thought of you slurpin down noodles really rustles my jimmy
you suck at sexting
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
You smell like a steam boat captain.
Whatever your on right now, I want.
When we were in Vegas he tried to get an Elvis impersonator to act dead on a toilet so he could take photos. This is even worse
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
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