I'm gonna cuddle the shit out of you tomorrow
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
I have no idea who these bands are he's listening to. If his current playlist was a pandora station, however, it would be titled "music for closet cock gobblers"
WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
she asked me if i wanted her to take her wedding ring off while she was giving me a handjob.
he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
Thanks man, but unless some hot chick comes in to work with a case of beer and offers me a head job, I'm pretty much screwed for New Years
Puking on the side of the road and legitimately just got a head nod and thumbs up from an 80 year old man on a Segway... What the fuck?
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
I wish on days I started my period Chipotle would come to my house with a burrito bar ... Then give me a chocolate cake and a large beer.
He went snooping and now he's all intimidated by my super amazing box of sexy time toys.
Please stop calling it that.
so much tequila, so little girl.
Did you come home, throw out a ton of shoes, then leave again?
That is exactly what I did.
What the fuck was I thinking eating an entire tub of potato salad on acid. My stomach today bro
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