He said he was from Mississippi and my vagina clamped shut like a frightened oyster
make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
did i really try to jack off an athens police horse last night? please tell me youre kidding..
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
I asked for a dramatic "funeral" look for my makeup. They judged me.
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
Sit down my child. It's time you were told of my famous loss-of-virginity story entitled, "The Penis that Never Could."
And THIS is why we get drunk. No good story, documentation, or event happens by eating a salad. Alcohol consumption leads to good things
Starting the day with sex, coffee and productivity are what the founding fathers intended
It's election day and I was just tied up with an American flag scarf
You wanna see what happens when frozen corn meets an unhappy Andrew's face?
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
I threw up soo much that I started crying. Then his grandma randomly came in and started rubbing my back...
Randomize
