i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
if you do not get any action from him tonight, I am personally walking my drunk ass over there grabbing his tongue and sticking it in your mouth. this is getting ridiculous
I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i wish you were under my bed. you sexy russian fur trapper.
please. text the right number. youve been sending me these all night.
By "met a doctor" I really mean "fucked a pre med student"
when seducing a hipster, do you think taking a nude pic on a lomo-camera app would increase my chances? grainy off-colored boobs and telling him how much i like reading salinger?
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
I'm going through a really dark time right now
I don't want to hear it man. I just jerked it to a pic of my ex wife in a bikini. Buck up
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
My friends got engaged today and I learned the techniques of going upside down on a stripper pole. I'm not really sure who won...
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
He told me their parents think of me as the "drunk friend"...oddly enough, I'm ok with that
I cannot believe I am seriously having a conversation about my best friend's sexual prowess as a dream lesbian.
And the you walked in and said to the only under age dude "IM NOT SLEEPING WITH YOU TONIGHT!!!" You may not have high standards but thanks for not sleeping with my brother!
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