Instead of peeing my cute lil blue panties I peed in the train parking lot in front of an asian.
So I got a little fucked up on the punch, and made out with the family friend. Which is apparently morally reprehensible. I don't get that.
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
I like one night stands...theyre like crushes for big kids
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
It was my penance. God came down to me in the form of an angel and said, "you must atone for your sins, by puking in your mouth at church right before communion"
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
He played with my boobs the whole time we watched Scott Pilgrim and then started invited others to play with them too. It reminded me of how my mom gives out my french fries without asking.
That's good. Don't want to see you bellydancing in prison for homemade wine.
His dick's name has evolved from Sebastian to Big Daddy to Barbara Streisand to Barbara Walters. I think the transformation is finally complete.
Whiskey and tits go great with anything. Especially fire.
I also fell asleep on the side of a tree so like I hit my lowest point there but it was a good time
Not as bad as when you were sitting in the pond getting fed water
I got there and she was on her balcony drinking out of a bottle of vodka and smoking a cigar.
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