it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
Fuck Jersey, the house im in is so baller but this state just cannot win.
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
you threw up in someones recycling bin and left a note apologizing. how drunk do you think you were?!
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
This whole situation could've been avoided if you would've just let me open the beer
Finding a keg in our kitchen would be like god personally high fiving each of us.
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
I'm going to book club and then I'm going to get laid. Being in your 20s ain't so bad sometimes.
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself
I wish I could send you one of those donuts I had. Like teleport it to you. Because it would change your life
I smell Vodka. It's me. If anyone asks it's totally hand sanitizer.
Randomize
