On valentines day I took a girl on a date that I suspect was homeless
We agreed on being friends w/ benefits. Lets see if that really happens.
Ok, so that was not supposed to go to u, my bad. I feel horrible.
if socks could get pregnant i would have catholic amounts of kids
Using the ceiling fan to slice the hotdogs in mid-air can only be contributed to our liberal use of 1800.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We found her naked passed out on the bathroom floor. She didn't even make it to the shower. She was clutching the bathroom rug.
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
Just ran four miles to popeye's. And back. Dedication.
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
How do you leave a condom wrapper under my mom's pillow...
This may not be the best moment to laugh, but I am.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Good luck getting that all cat food off in the shower dumbass
I was stuffing my vagina with gummy bears last night having him eat them out of me. Team Haribo for the win!
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
But I think I successfully seduced her with my alias.
Somehow, walking in on your drunk mom in a diaper was the least traumatic thing I saw last night
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
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