There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
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I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
His words said "save me", but his penis said "I'll take my chances"
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so apparently last weekend we taught the mascot how to shotgun beers. am i winning college yet?
She wanted me to stick my dick in the birthday cake she got me
I'm sad about how hungover I'm gonna feel tomorrow.
She said I'm like warm bathroom-sink water. There's nothing necessarily wrong with me, but she doesn't exactly want to "drink me in"
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
Idk but when you think about it the last time I did bottomless mimosas I ended up getting my nipples pierced so it might be fair
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