1. Call me if you need ANYTHING. 2. If you get tag teamed, I want details.
I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
Down at cameli's and some homeless dude just pulled out a taser. Awesome.
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
Hey sorry for being annoying last night, I just realized how many times I yelled "JORDAN!" during and after playing pong.
If I had a dollar for every straight boy that questioned their sexuality because of me, I would live a comfortable middle-class life.
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
I went out to have a smoke, and next thing I know, he's got me bent over a picnic table praying to deities I don't believe in. You should have been there.
I'm fucking sick of guys. I think I'm going to date myself. No drama. And I know I'll always put out.
There was pot, but there are no Doritos, no Funyons, no Oreos.
Send help.
Good news, finally found someone who remembers Saturday night. Bad news, everyone in the bar saw your penis
Ugh. My life is a never ending cycle of bad decisions and taquitos.
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
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