I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
TRUE LIFE: my roommate is growing a bush.
better yet, TRUE LIFE: my roommates boyfriend begged her to grow a bush.
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
I just called my cat a slut and she responded. Proudest moment ever.
i woke up in the fire place with a lighter in my hand. if i would have died the night would have made up for it.
Oh we will ALWAYS be together. Or I'll have to delete my Facebook altogether. I've drunkenly boobie trapped photos of us into every album. There's no way I'd ever have the patience to go through that deletion process.
Woke up in a wet suit with my junk cut out. In a strange apartment. Just found thing biggest bong u have ever seen. WHERE ARE YOU?!?!?!
I never want to do this again, I'm going to chew off several fingers and apply for disability
Last night at the bar you we're seriously going up to people and pushing through them like they were bowling pins and you were a bowling ball
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
I LACK THE NECESSARY BRAIN FUNCTIONS TO BE ABLE TO PROPERLY RESPOND TO THAT
Can't meet up at the party. Gary was caught by the cops attempting to drop a deuce thru his ex wife's Subaru via sun roof. Details as soon as bail is processed.
saw a family tailgating a graduation with hard liquor... i'm assuming yours?
are you shitting me? they told me they'd at least wait until 10am
Randomize
