Do you have swine flu?
I know my taste in men is not always top notch; however, I don't sleep with swine.
Pigs, yes. Swine, no.
u know ur in oregon when the cop tells u to keep the beer cans he made u pour out so u can recycle them
I just set a weed brownie on fire in the microwave.
Successful day.
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And i laid in the yard with carrots on my chest cause i wanted a bunny
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
He peed in the bird bath. Those birds are gonna be pissed
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
You're seeing with your vagina, not your eyes.
Do me a favor and don't mention him I feel like Regina George and I just want to scream I made him
Just took physics exam. I think this is one of those 'chuck it in the fuck-it bucket and become an art major' days
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
Getting high with your mom, but thinking of you!
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