she was so not down for the gang bang
we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
I just named my vagina "The Boneyard"
More like "Chia Pet"
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
i woke up this morning next to my toilet covered in an attempt to make blanket of toilet paper
I always have trouble explaining my life decisions to people over the age of 30.
When you hit the 45 minute mark of any argument about The Flintstones, you have to realize: it's no longer you arguing, it's the cocaine arguing.
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Haha...we lost by one cup to a guy w shitty facial hair. What makes me most mad abt the loss is that I could grow a better beard on my vag.
You aren't going to like my movie choice because it's a Disney movie, but I am cordially inviting you to the couch for blowjobs.
I actually just took 17 pictures of some guy at the gas station that needs to marry me now
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
I am far too sober to understand you right now. sorry.
My penis definitely considers my Captain Cock costume a success
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