What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
I can't believe im sexting my roommate. This is really what my life has come to
For my job application I just put "community gardener- personal business" for my previous work experience in place of the neighborhood pot grower/distributor
just spent the last 4 hours covering his room in sticky notes. Viva Drunk Thursdays.
Ignoring the crisis im in. Sitting in the front yard in a kiddie pool. Wearing arm floaties, fins and a snorkel. Waiting for a hot guy to walk by.
sometimes i feel like my only option in life is to be drunk or be a cat. today i am drunk
she tried to handfeed me fritos while yelling "PENIS TRAIN"
Hey so I just want to get straight to the point it was me who ate the last cupcake and it was your sister who I fucked last nigt
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
Dude, we apparently put a washing machine drum in that back of your truck with the full intention of making a bonfire in it.
Dude, I traded weed for crunch berries. Happy Thursday.
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
I guess I’m only into threesomes at Halloween, because I just woke up next to “Marilyn Monroe” and “Joe DiMaggio” in their condo
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