You know, Peter Parker would not have been nearly as cool if he had gotten bitten by an ant.
As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
Just woke up. First thing I see: Little brother eating last night's jello shots thinking they're reg jello.
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
just explained the breakup in detail to my big toes. that consolation brownie was Amazing.
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
Our lady landlord called. Dot worry, I handled it. Drunk. Tell her it was Nate. Done. Good. Bye. Drunk.
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
I was gonna buy a KIA, but then I remembered how awesome the sex was in the back of a Hyundai so I went with that.
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
I'M MAKING HIKING PLANS WITH THE GIRL WHO IS DATING MY EX, THAT IS PERSONAL FUCKING GROWTH
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
And my butt misses you like the deserts miss the rain.
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Randomize
