you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
I'd suck anything for a pizza right now
The dentist just giggled when he accidentally shot water across my face, I can sense how he treats women.
Word is he has some crazy hawaiian STD
You do realize that you tried to eat the neighbors cat because the dominos guy was 5 minutes late. You would have succeeded if we didnt stop you.
He doesn't need to speak English. He needs to speak sex.
Not sure how I feel about St Psts and March Madness being on the same weekend. I feel like I've been screwed out of a drunk holiday.
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
HIS TAN HAS PUT ME TO SHAME. HE TOOK HIS PANTS OFF AND HIS DICK LOOKED LIKE A GHOST
Yeah.. I'm sorry I broke your phone. But in my defense you handed me the frying pan.
guy next to me on the train just pulled out two bottles of gin and a block of cheddar. is slowly making his way through all of them.
SHE BROUGHT HER PARROT TO THE PARTY. IT SQUAWKS EVERY TIME SOMEONE VOMITS LIKE 'PARTY FOUL SQUAWKKKKKK'
I feel like my sexual preferences are just another sign that I am a 75 year old drag queen in a 29 year old woman's body.
He seduced me by making me nachos. It worked.
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
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