I just saw the girl you left with - Chris Hansen's looking for you
i didn't know you could wash puke off of bras with a dishwasher.
I just heard a teenager say to his friend "dats my baby! i was hittin her up on myspace like gurllll. she got me steamin". must have missed the memo its 2005 and we still use myspace.
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
Got serenaded to on the streets of Denver...the song was about a young banana that made really big decisions, got stds, and joined a gang. I think I like Colorado
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.
Did you put candle wax on my balls last night?
Came home to my roommate drinking a 40 in the shower. Chugging with his hair still fully shampoo'd.
I found a loose wire in my thermostat. Couldn't find the pliers, so I used a nipple clamp to fix it.
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
They call you PBJ boy because you were trying to seduce me with pieces of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Successfully might I add.
Randomize