I am drinking with my family and the average drinking tolerance is a shot and a half. I feel like the incredible hulk.
So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
I've decided I'm just gonna keep drinking til the baby bump shows...
Tell your boss that he's keeping you from eating a fuck sundae off of these 36-24-36 34 D's waiting for you at home on Valentine's Day.
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out.
Im covered in vodka and melted gummys. Fuck summer.
My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good.
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
I never want to do this again, I'm going to chew off several fingers and apply for disability
Passing out drunk in my therapists lobby may not be the best way to confirm my "stability"
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
I'm determined to sit on that face.
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
fucking him is like fucking old faithful. you could set your watch by his orgasms.
Randomize
