Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
so i slept on a park bench last night...no hobo
Bonnaroo quote of the day: "why the fuck am i pregnant?!?!" - exclaimed loudly by random hippie.
he had more hair on his balls then in my Easter basket
Yeah. I stopped her before she flashed the guy for a free slice of pizza. She called me a gentleman and then before I knew it she was in my bed.
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
I just almost said to a customer "P as in Pussy"
Start warming up your vocal cords, because Fucking With The Windows Open season has arrived.
No I have an idea, I saw you running through the neighborhood at 3am while I searched for my flip flops in a ditch
Am I not being subtle enough by giving him a rainbow striped bong, during PRIDE MONTH?
Just had ice cream and a blow job come together in one glorious, defining moment.
Fuck it, if you can't drink cheep beer and whiskey with me, I don't want you.
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
Randomize