we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
I woke up in the penthouse and did lines off the to of the fireplace. This is not real.
i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
I was just "that girl you seen blowing some dude outside when you drove by"
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
Nope. He totaled my car then moved back to Louisiana to work things out with baby mama. I sure know how to pick em
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.
That moment when your whole family facetimed you just moments before you threw up all over the entire living room
I'm having post-experience "why didn't I fuck her in a public bathroom" regrets
Running my fingers through my hair was like that scene in Patch Adams where the old lady got to swim in a pool of pasta. I love Molly.
I can't wash the smell of tacos off my hands. I feel like the Lady Macbeth of Chipotle.
Sabotage it. Cum quick. Make it awkward so you don't hurt her feelings. Who says nice guys finish last?
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
Good morning beautiful! Wanna steal a cat this weekend?
Randomize
