tequila makes my crab dance SOOOO much better
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
you passed out on the bathroom floor with the door locked. we had to break in and no one was sober enough to move you so they just threw a towel on you and stepped over you
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
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i find it unbelievable that you didn't think it was necessary to intervene when i started letting people autograph my body with spray tan.
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
Every time I see him I get horny. I can't help it!
Just stop. You're making other wives look bad. We are all starting to hate you.
You called me at 3 am laughing like an idiot. Apparently you consider breaking out of the hospital to be a lifetime achievement.
She tackled him mid-puke while the other two were cutting up a $60 dildo with a kitchen knife and putting the pieces in a Corona bottle.
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She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
I'm a bit broke right now... Would it be OK if I pay you in champagne and Xanax?
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
Says the girl who left her friends to go have phone sex in the bathroom at Michael's
How'd your date go last night?
Well I blacked out at 1:30 and woke up naked in not-my-date's bed with an uneaten Jimmy John's sandwich.
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
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