i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
There's two girls at the bar sniffing each others boobs.
we found you in the closet, clutching coats that werent yours for stability
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
So we have also come to the conclusion that slam piece Saturday's are the appropriate follow ups to find a husband Fridays
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
I'm sure we could go all project runway on our diapers and create some flattering absorbent thongs. We could do it on the Boat. Call it project rumway.
No Bryan wants to get drunk, rub inappropriate dudes legs, talk about my vagina and send me pics of his boomerang dick. That's not how you watch basketball.
That's how he does EVERYTHING!
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
I can already feel the hangover I'll be having on New Year's Day. I don't know if I'm prepared for this.
But seriously, I love you and you are a good person and I'll get you some ecstasy
Randomize
