I just don't understand how my upright asian catholic roommate is getting more than me.
This frat boy drinking a forty and wearing a pussy patrol shirt just ran out in front of my car. I should have used less brakes.
I just banged two guys while dressed like an angel. I love this holiday.
she's using motion activated glade air fresheners as some sort of early warning system
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im 95% ready to shit behind 711
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
the saddest part is, this is not even the first time i've woken up in a shopping cart with a concussion.
We need to get you laid. Or i fear you might explode like a firework of sexual innuendos and unfulfilled erotic fantasies.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Some guy Just sang about my ass on the street
It was terrible lyrics but I would have thrown my life savings into that guitar case if I had any.
Well, you were never considered a shining example of sobriety anyway
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
I don't remember that much at all. But I guess I met this guy from New Zealand and his dog, and then I punched someone in the face.
You invited these random guys into your apartment that you met in the hallway...& then you started screaming at them to get out cause you didn't know who they were.
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
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