Omg just saw this kid I went to elementary school with at the bar and he used to be cool and I was so awkward but now I have boobs so I WIN.
Get dressed up for her? please, I could shit my pants and she would still blow me
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
I want you to tape your fingers together and give me a lobster claw hand job.
i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line.
We're gonna have the chick that teaches kindergarteners to fold origami roll the joints.
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
I've been vomiting all day.
All day? It's 10am.
You know you gave a quality blow job when you have to ice your neck and jaw the next day.
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
It's nice doing the walk of shame at 530 am, the birds are chirping, campus is empty, and it's dark so noone can see who the Fuck you are
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