my mom asked me how i could steal on a clear conscious and i told her it was because when i was younger she let me watch alladin and he did it.
Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
Cop gave me a ticket for public drunkedness, and then I convinced him to drive me back to the party
My mom's mothers day present consisted of a card, chocolate and the rose bush I threw up in as I was getting in last night. She loved it.
My autobiography is now tentatively titled "I'm Fucking the DJ, and Other Ways to Party for Cheap"
I haven't seen him since I gave him a hand job in the hospital. I like to think I contributed to his speedy recovery.
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
There's a girl in class eating a pumpkin pie. Like a whole pie straight from the pan with a fork.
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
Why was I lying under a truck last night?
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
Randomize
