So my roomate was sunbathing this morning on the porch with a sock covering his penis
Sounds like a really classy character....
He is classy. It was argyle.
I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
Oh my god you would drunk register for a marathon.
My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
My birth control alarm just woke me up from my dream where I was pregnant. Thank god.
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
So apparently we dropped beers outside the apartment last night, and someone RETURNED them! Ha like what? I just walked out the front door to Christmas in a box on my doorstep.
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
And on that day, Satan said; "Let there be the friend zone and let us get fucking high." while Jesus silently cried in the background.
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
My sister and her gf showed up at my door with no pants on at 4 AM talking claiming its hot.
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