Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
I would like to thank collapsed soviet republics and fathers who didnt show enough attention for tonight's festivities
a girl just told me i should have been born earlier in the alphabet
im goin to the NYE party with a tuxedo painted on my body. i know a girl who does it. wanna join?
The bouncer asked you what your sign was and u replied "syracuse"
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
A reason for us to be drunk all week National Singles Week
So are we just not going to talk about the time I came home to you jerking it in the kitchen?
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
Why did I wake up to a snap chat of myself drinking beer out of a blender?
It's one PM on a Saturday and I'm sitting here drinking Jack, eating a block of cheese and playing Minecraft. Please tell me you can come drag me to a bar.
I seriously feel like I just crawled out from under a shit covered rock. I'm NEVER drinking like that again...well, not for alteast a solid 3 hours.
Randomize
