you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
I realized as I was wesiging my engamemby ring that you'd never love me tha same. I have life plans and Sam showed them to me
What? You're not speaking real words.
"Is there dairy in semen?" was in her recent google searches...so she's lactose intolerant AND a slut.
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
Things you are not allowed to do while im gone: sell cats on ebay, put cats in freezer again, shave cats like lions, dye cats pink/blue, try to light cats on fire to"wake them up from their nap" agian
Oh I already celebrated valentine's day. I stayed up until 4 AM listening to biggie, drinking rum, and caressing all my girl curves in front of the mirror. And then I came 3 times.
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
Youre the drunk baby that everyone wants to take care of.
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
Pretty sure the guy at the Halloween party dressed as an ice cream man is working his way through the building without a care for gender or age. He high-fives me on his way out each morning.
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
I just tried to get a motorcycle cop to give me a ride....he told me not to ask strangers for rides
He said when the pizza came I zip locked one slice and went to the couch and snuggled with it. Does that give you an idea of how my night was?
Sorry I fucked your cousin. Again. I just wanted him to take me on his boat.
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