How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
she said "can't you just pull out and cum on my face? I hate scooping jizz out of my vag".
I'm assuming you texted me by mistake. you're not jizzing in or on me again, thanks for playing, douchebag.
it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
it must be christmas time, i've got a hankering to give a virgin a baby....
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
Please delete that video of me blowing you. I will repay you with 100 blowjobs even better than the one I gave you during that video. Please. I am gonna be a grandma one day.
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
Haha I'M GOING TO MISS HIS PENIS SO MUCH. But not his bipolarness.
3.5 bazillion penises. So not that hard to find a new good one
I traded some nice guy at the bar ten bucks and a pack of cigarettes for his leather jacket. I'm pretty sure I win at life. Whoever is in my phone as Tyler Durden, I thank you.
If I get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to celebrate. If I don't get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to forget. Win-Win
You ran the halls of the dorm naked handing out condoms. You were the sex fairy. Best you can do if you're not getting laid.
Randomize
