he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
turkey basters and jungle juice, is that really the whole shopping list for new year's?
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
maybe her throwing up on me was a foreshadowing of how she would later metaphorically throw up on my life
Your heart is a swirling cauldron of blackness that does not pump blood but rather a sludgey mixture of evil and broken dreams.
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
Do you remember ripping my condom off last night while yelling "I DEMAND MY MEAT RAW" like a Viking?
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
You’d probably be happy to know that I think I’ve mastered the skill of knowing “my type” and then steering clear
FINALLY. I THOUGHT THIS DAY WOULD NEVER COME!
I think my roomie is silently judging me for spraining my foot by having sex in a bounce house
so the bounce house and tequila was good idea then?
Randomize
