Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
I wanted to tell him he wasn't actually in me, but my god, awkward?
if pee wee herman would have taken a snuggie to the movies he wouldnt have gotten caught
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Is it bad that I was more upset about not getting the perfume he told me he had bought for me then the actual breakup?
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
then my gynecologist said "its like opening up buried treasure"
My lips are red and swollen. Solid proof that giving head is a viable alternative to lipstick and plumper.
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I might come over. Something about you makes me matronly and I have this urge to nurse you back to health with soup and a blowjob
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
At least your night didn't end with three cops seeing your ass and you sitting on the ground in a wig throwing your shoes at people
Alls I wanted was a fun New Years but I end up fingering a geico sales representative on a futon and giving her a ride to work the next morning
Grandma's bordering on serious shit show territory at this point.
How bad is it that I can say that this isn't the first time a married man, who is in the military, has tried to make me his mistress?
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