he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
Someone sharpied 'shit show' on my tits. Someone with excellent penmanship
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
You chucked an empty vodka bottle against the wall and yelled "Everyone calm the fuck down, it's just the cops." After 10 seconds of silence I looked over and saw you pissing their fountain.
You were crying in a drunken stupor for an hour because "the new daft punk album didn't blow your tits off"
She jumped on a table and took off her shirt and started yelling things that no one understood. For being 3, she has a dead on impression of a drunk party girl.
My boobs are numb because I've been using them as stress balls
pretty sure I woke up to him jacking himself off IN MY BED
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
I just got free tacos, you would be so proud of me.
Clarification, I got free tacos without performing any sexual favors.
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
If waffles and beer don't scream "fuck me!" then I don't know what else to do.
Randomize
