waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
These headphones make me feel like I'm sitting on John Mayers lap and he's singing just to me. I picture like a pitch black room with a single spotlight on us. Also, convinced Kyle to give me percocet soo.
sticking your hands in the toilet to wash your face is not acceptable. ever. i don't care how drunk you are.
You know, I had the money for a pregnancy test, but at the time, tacos were more important.
No, trust me. Falling down the stairs is a fucking sobering experience.
ecstacy + fleshlight = not all that upset about being newly single anymore
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
I used his number to look up his customer information at work. He's no longer saved as Magic Penis in my phone.
Dude, you got arrested and then texted 911 to tell them you'd been kidnapped with a screenshot of your current location.
The bump on my forehead, i think, was from falling asleep at front door, on my knees, slumped over. But we played good music so what?
If I die tonight, you and your brother can split my money evenly for college only.
all $38?
I think I achieved my goal of being high for 24 hours in the same week I promised myself I wouldn't smoke anymore
He said when the pizza came I zip locked one slice and went to the couch and snuggled with it. Does that give you an idea of how my night was?
Randomize