it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
I haven't gotten laid in forever. I'm obsessed. I imagine I this is how Ethopians feel about food.
i just overheard my mom tell my dad he should drink less so he could hit the right hole
I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
You are colorful like whore, yet adorable, like sad puppy. You need more drink.
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
No need to call an exterminator, the ants overdosed on the leftover lines on the counter.
I passed out in all my clothes. like my purse too..and with a cup of water next to me..and my last tweet last night was "Bye."
I have to pee in a cup in the morning and they are going to say....you just peed a miller light. I'm going to hang my head in shame and say yes...yes I did.
I've got five complains from the landlord about she being too loud during sex in two weeks I'm marrying her
I wish there was a tumbleweed emoji. Because that would describe my vagina.
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”
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