OMFG I JUST SAW SOMEONE GIVING SOMEONE ELSE ROAD HEAD AND THEY HIT A POTHOLE. my day has been officially made.
You know, as long as there were ice cream breaks, I would totally eat chips for a living.
By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever
I woke up face down on my laptop with three windows open: itunes, chat roulette and redtube
i'm at the st pattys day thing. the bar is packed. they just put on celine dion its all coming back to me now. i'm screaming the words.
it's 1 pm.
Just saw the first guy i ever slept with in drag. I can hear my grandfather saying "i knew she was a lesbian" somewhere
I said i love rain, just to change the subject, and he said 'id like to do it in the rain'. Dear lord. He doesnt stop
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
we are sitting in a kindergarden classroom alone chugging beer. look at our lives. look at our choices.
I just tried to text you by typing "whoa" into my contacts.
Drinking heavily at 3pm and about to rescue a 30lb street turtle. Dont even bother attempting to rise to this level bitch
I woke up in confetti... confetti and shame
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
Randomize
