i just had sex bonerless
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
Pick my eyebrow is burning. I'm sitting in the back of dolows vat and listening to jolly music and wilfgang is signing and looking food. Cute kid. Home is where I go now.
what. the. fuck.
I just had a dream where Bob Saget recognized me from when I hung out with him in a dream I had months ago.
That's true. There's really no bad time to take a Vicodin.
It is the Reeses peanut butter cup of pharmaceuticals.
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
He was sleeping, but the way he was made him look like an adorable, fuzzy penis
no. i discovered the *exact* amount of drugs i need to do to understand calculus.
I had a drink called "the white nun." It tasted like Marshmallows, and celibacy.
I almost had sex in a public restroom last night in case you're wondering how much of a mess 22 is for me
You know you're high when, "Why can't I steal the duck?!" Becomes a serious question.
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...
What??! Dude I'm not having you barging in at like 2 am smelling of cigarettes and disappointment to sleep on my couch and then have an awkward morning with my wife while I'm at work.
Touché sir
I'm being hhit on by creepy guys please come one bought me a penis hat balloon animal save meeeee
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