Goodnight my chunky, little, marshmallow muncher
Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
Lost my key. Fell asleep on the doorstep and got woken up by host grandma poking me with a broom.
The sun is so bright. Whhyyyyy. EYES ARE DEAD.
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
She must've been waiting down the street cause after I said I specialized in inner-thigh-face-massage it couldn't have been 2 minutes until she was on my couch.
took shots off of a myriad of fake boobs last night. It was glorious.
He has a beach house and a Simba tattoo. Our wedding is next Tuesday, hope you're free.
He is in my tree wearing full on scuba gear ... Get here asap.
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