Reason #437 to hate Louisiana: Just went to the public bathroom at work. It was so humid the toilet seat was damp and sticky. Either it's the humidity or I sat in somebody's yesterday piss. I choose to believe the humidity.
He looked at me like he has never had a girl throw up on him before.
you have no idea how wierd it is to get nudes while talking to grandma
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
Don't talk about his dick. That's mine. There's a copyright on it. Use with permission
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
COOKIE DOUGH CUPCAKES ARE A THING
Did you really just send me a blank text in response to news as awesome as that?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
the bright side of moving is at least my Tinder options will refresh
Oh. My. God. It is NOT okay to drink Johnny Walker when there is no Jameson. My skull is eating my brain.
I gave your mom a discount on her coffee, its my way to say thanks for having a son that makes me come every time
All I can taste is Pickle Juice and Cocaine.
Is it still sex if there's no nudity, no orgasms, but the neighbors bang on the wall and ask you to stop? I've honestly forgotten.
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