Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
Holy shit! This guy had his hands and feet handcuffed and was scooting across the interstate and we almost hit him because it was so dark. I hate Louisiana.
You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
I forgot to mention I threw up in my wine glass AND my neighbors empty cup.
You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
Turns out shot glasses hold the perfect serving of sour patch kids....I still fail to see how not having any real glasses is an issue
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
Wearing the 'Let's Party' thong feels weird without you...
He's my favorite late night booty call. He lives next to a Wendy's.
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
GIIIIRL I AM STONED AF AND I HAVE A HOMEMADE POT PIE IN THE OVEN THIS PARTY IS LIT.
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
Leave it to my mom and I to turn the hearing into a drinking game.
Randomize
