Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
Tempting. But I already used the alcohol poisoning excuse at work this month. No way he would believe it a second time...
There r osticjed everywhere
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
Woke up the next morning in an 8 year old's bedroom. Saw my bra swinging from the spiderman ceiling fan and decided it would be best to dip out w/o it.
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
While leaving the bar with another guy I told the bouncer I was sad his friend had a fiancee
You were drinking Everclear weren't you?
Check 'smoke weed with our ihop waiter' off of our To-Do List
Try explaining "the nature of your relationship" to a cop when your fuck buddy vandalized your car. Priceless.
She said she didn't know what fireball was. We are no longer friends.
Just in case you forgot, last night you came home drunk and pissed all over my laptop. You owe me a laptop.
I don't care how hot she was, she wouldn't stop singing "Shut Up and Dance", instant boner-killer.
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
Randomize
