The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
just walked past a girl in her cap and gown puking her brains out beside a tree. her friends were taking pictures of her.
I left him a voicemail saying i went through with the abortion and he texts me back one thing... the bbm "phew" face. really?
Dear slutty diary: I lied about feeling guilty of being a homewrecker in order to have more sex. it worked.
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
Don't come. It's not even a party it's a total sausage fest. Like 20 drunk dudes in a bedroom. We can still drink by ourselves though it'll be ok
You declared war on your ex and then had sex with who you thought was her sister. No one knows who she was but we think your dick might be in danger.
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
No it's only my right leg that feels like it's about to fall off. The left is fine.
I lost a whole day of my life. Apparemtly I was using my deodrant as a phone. And is my phone there?
Our group of friends now have more broken bones than reasonable excuses for why they're broken.
The worst thing about having to live at your parents again is the struggle to make up more excuses to cover up the booty calls.
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
Randomize
