Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
he obviously didn't care that i was sleeping and dreaming about ellen degeneres knitting me a christmas sweater.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We have sex, then we talk about foreign policy. Its a win-win.
Hey I'm not sure why your jacket's covered in maple syrup but I just realized you didn't leave the house earlier wearing a jacket...
This is America. Deny every slut accusation or own up to it
I'm pretty sure I'm the first person in the history of this college to rollerblade their walk of shame.
It's like you're the one guy who got the "girls have clits" memo.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bought a gym bag tonight. Used it to bring my Taco Bell in the house.
Thursday is not a good day to become a felon... It's bingo night
Only you could make a reflective vest look even remotely sexy
there’s plenty of nice guys out there with good jobs and NO felonies!
Why did I wake up naked with a leg cramp and and extra $550 in my wallet?
I WILL KICK YOU IN THE FUCKING THROAT IF YOU EAT MY FUCKING ICE CREAM.
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