So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
I love you
are you drunk
yes but I def love you, we should get married
But I'm Jewish
embrace Jesus
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
yeah, and then after the convo was clearly over, my dad decides to scream "SIZE MATTERS" just to make things even more uncomfortable.
I just can't bring boyfriends home.
we had you propped up in a chair and fed you donuts. i've never seen you happier
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
He spent most of his night trying to convince people that he had changed and was no longer a sleazebag...he had his nut hanging out of his pants about an hour later.
Because when I say 'You shouldn't drink anymore', she hears, 'I personally challenge you to chug 3 more mixed drinks'
I'm taking it from the chunk of pizza I just pulled out my hair that we ate pizza last night?
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
You were visibly distraught that my boyfriend and I didn't have sex in your bed. You forced us to take your condoms.
We were on the ground in Tampa for 55 hours and we drank for 30 of them.
We won Spring Training 2013.
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... Men can be so sensitive...
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
Dude, seriously, fucking stop introducing me as "Thomas, with the dick piercing." you are the worst wingman ever.
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