Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
I'm passing your future prison.
im just going to superglue mistletoe to my forehead and see what happens
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
noo you weren't that drunk. you just knocked the grill over and couldn't get the key in the door, so you climbed through the window. success.
When did it seem like a good idea to do pull ups off the balcony? After beer 5 or shot 7?
Congratulations, you have helped solved the mysterious disapperance of Dani's phone which was found in the munchies cabinet next to the oreos. Your reward is star power as well as a fat ass bowl of Nebula. You may proceed through the wardrobe and into Narnia for your prize.
All I want is tacobeell and your body
that's my favorite sentence you've ever said.
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
Well, I found the missing blow... in my fucking suitcase... THIS MORNING. Yeah, I flew from FL to NY with blow in my suitcase yesterday.
I told you to check, dude
Yeah, AFTER I checked my bag and I was already sitting on a plane. Oh well. I figured worst case I'd do like 15 hours in county and I was totally prepared for that anyways. I always prepare for that when we hang out.
Oooo. Can we pretend to be Amanda Bynes?
She bought wigs like Disney princesses. I want to be her.
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
I think the pizza guy was in shock..
Well I didn't mean to answer the door only in socks but I mean come on, 4 hours of sex works up an appetite! I WAS RAVENOUS
Always great to be boarding a plane when you realize that what you thought was gas is actually very untrustworthy
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