I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
Red Bull/Vodka? You bet I'm showing everyone my penis tonight.
I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
all i remember is screaming butter knifes are for pussies.
Can you bring me a pair of sunglasses to the bathroom please... Don't judge me.
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
You should know I just got pulled aside by TSA because they found a bottle of Bud Light in my backpack... Thanks for that...
they won't let me drive with my sombrero
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
So stoned i forgot i was in bed
We had half a pitcher of beer left and he asked us if we wanted a to-go cup. Fuck yeah we want it to-go.
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
She's the perfect storm of great hair, big boobs, intellectualism, and mild moral ambiguity.
I have a bandage in my ass crack. In. My. Ass. Crack.
Randomize
