Do you realize we just stole 12 dollars worth of quarters each from the office petty cash just to get manicures? New high or New Low?
They should make a Rosetta Stone that allows men to understand what the fuck women are actually trying to say.
Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
FYI If I die in my sleep it is because I drank a bottle of coke from 1986. I needed a mixer
So the doctor told me that I am starting to showing the early signs of liver cirrhosis. Thank you Jack Daniels for making the first 26 years of my life awesome.
I began mixing captain Morgan and jack daniels and called it captain jack sparrow. I puked. a lot.
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
All I can taste is Pickle Juice and Cocaine.
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
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