Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
Omg just saw this kid I went to elementary school with at the bar and he used to be cool and I was so awkward but now I have boobs so I WIN.
Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
You told me alcohol would be the death of you then ordered 10 shots of tequila.
Yes I was being legit. That's the only plant I want in my house. A growing penis.
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
Ugh. Lets go crawl into a dairy-gluten-chlamydia free hole somewheres.
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
I don't care what the Chinese zodiac calendar says . . . 2015 is the year of the cock!
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
You’re going to be a doctor, and I’m going to be a trophy wife. We both have goals
She's like a cask of Amontillado. Very tempting if I was drunk, but sober, I know I'll get fucked over in the end.
Randomize
