I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
so last night my mother drunkenly told me that maybe the reason why I want to be a vet was because I was conceived doggy style.
Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
I woke up in my girlfriends bed with another guy laying next to me. wtf.
i think the date started going downhill when i mentioned how many therapists i have
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
Your two fuck buddies playing ping pong together. HOW. ADORABLE!
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
You kept showing the cop the bruises on the bottoms of your feet and claiming you were a medical mystery.
im that hungover where parking at red lights has to be done
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
I can't remember dinner
Hahaha "rub in the ketchup on your face, It'll just look like blush." some gay waiter said that to you, and you go "good idea!"
The only math I use in every day life is figuring out how much I can spend on alcohol and still have money to pay my bills. High school lied to us.
The cop that got shot in the dick is here, let the entertainment begin.
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
Randomize
