he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
Apparently campus cops frown on lighting a joint off of the eternal flame on Jerry Falwell's grave...
You know how I've been hooking up with my ex? Well he told me he loved me and I said I was just there for sex so let's get it done. He looked sad, but he did it anyways. And life was good again.
My ideal friend would be my dog as a drug dealer
He was super stoned and then he compared doing meth to having anal sex and told me to "ride that cowboy." The cowboy being my ex.
I had sex on a dinosaur comforter, tell me that does not define my life.
He called me skinny, I broke his garbage disposal, then denied him sex. Normal second date etiquette.
look on the scale of 1 to the time you hit an old lady with your car chlamydia barely even rates
I think John will remember that birthday for a while. I'm still dying at the fact a stripper was hunting me down.
moral of the story: if your going to mix ambien and free skyclub alcohol, take a direct flight or have a layover in a city you wouldn't mind having to return to for a court date.
In her defense, she didn't know I had a twin brother. Plus, we're even: I banged her sister.
I'm reading the Hobbit in my blanket fort alone with a bottle of wine... all I need is dungeons and dragons to complete this superfecta of awesome
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